You Are Fearfully and Wonderfully Made.

It is hard to believe one month ago I became a mom. For two years I prayed endlessly for God to answer the desires of my heart. Night after night I would pray the same prayer faithfully knowing there was a chance becoming a mom may not be in God’s plan. I knew if God had a different path for me, He would guide me in the direction He saw fit. As I sit here and stare at my precious  bundle of joy, I am reminded how faithful God is. I did not deserve this blessing but I thank God everyday for calling me to be Atticus’ mom. 

Many of you followed my pregnancy. Many of you texted, prayed, or called. But many of you have no idea the journey to May 12,2017. On the outside, everything looked normal. Everything looked like it was going well. But many of you do not know the battles I faced during my nine months being pregnant. During my pregnancy I faced many ups and downs before being blessed with the greatest miracle of my life. 

August 2016. My prayers were answered. I was pregnant. 17 pregnancy tests, blood work, and an ultrasound… I was officially pregnant after being told one month before, it would never happen for me naturally. Even though this was supposed to be the happiest time of my life; there were many trials I had to face.

During my nine months of being pregnant; I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism (and told I should prepare for a miscarriage), became anemic, told my baby would be down syndrome (because an ultrasound showed he could “potentially” have echogenic bowel syndrome), and an abortion was suggested(resulting in  2 doctor changes and a hospital change). Just to name a few. 

I could have easily questioned God as to why I had to face so many lows, but I realize now He was testing me to see if I would stay faithful. There were many nights I would fall to my knees and beg God not to let anything happen to my baby. I specifically remember praying, ” Lord, if your will is to bring Atticus Ellis to this earth, regardless of His condition, I will praise you endlessly and be the best mother I can be.” 

Many of us face trials. We lose jobs, love ones, friends, etc. During these times it is so easy to question God instead of praising Him in those storms. I thank God everyday for blessing me the opportunity to be a mother. I love Atticus more than anything in this world and he is a constant reminder of how big and faithful my God is. 

When you are down and facing a rough patch in your life, remember there is someone looking down that as a higher power than anything you could ever face. Keep your faith and trust in God. He will not lead you astray. 

“Be Joyful in hope, Patient in affliction, and Faithful in prayer. “- Romans 12:12

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